What Pre Cana is and where the name comes from
Church teachingPre Cana is the name many parishes in the United States give to marriage preparation. It points to the wedding at Cana, where Jesus worked his first sign at a marriage feast. The name is informal, but the idea behind it is Church teaching: the Catechism calls preparation for marriage of prime importance, so that the couple's yes is free, responsible and built on solid ground.
The sacrament you are preparing for is not only a ceremony. Christian spouses receive a grace proper to Matrimony, which perfects their love and strengthens their unity on the road to holiness. Preparation is the time to understand that gift before you receive it. Our longer guide to Catholic marriage preparation explains what the Church asks and why.
"By reason of their state in life and of their order, [Christian spouses] have their own special gifts in the People of God." This grace proper to the sacrament of Matrimony is intended to perfect the couple's love and to strengthen their indissoluble unity.
Why couples choose to do Pre Cana online
Pastoral guidanceCouples look for an online option for ordinary reasons. One of you works shifts. You live in different cities until the wedding. The next parish weekend is months away. Or you simply want more time on the topics a one day course can only touch.
An online program does not have to be thinner than a parish weekend. Done well, it gives you more space for the conversations that matter: how you handle conflict, what each of you expects from family life, how you understand intimacy, and how you will plan your family with natural family planning. You can pause a week when life is busy and come back to it together.
Online, parish weekend or diocesan course
None of these formats is the right one for every couple. Many parishes accept a combination, for example a meeting with the priest, an inventory questionnaire and a course. Here is how they usually compare.
| Pre Cana online with us | Parish weekend | Diocesan course | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Schedule | Any time, 8 weeks at your pace | Fixed dates | Fixed dates |
| Setting | Just the two of you | Group of couples | Group of couples |
| Depth on intimacy and NFP | Two full weeks plus the library | Short talk | Varies by diocese |
| Questions you would not ask aloud | Private consultation and Ask with Sources | Limited | Limited |
| Record of completion | Certificate listing every module | Parish record | Diocesan certificate |
| Who accepts it | Ask your parish | The hosting parish | Parishes in that diocese |
The eight weeks of the Engaged program
Pastoral guidanceEach week has a short lesson, readings drawn from Church documents with the paragraph numbers, an exercise for the two of you and a set of conversation cards. The weeks build on each other.
- Weeks 1 and 2. Your story, your reasons for marrying and what it means that marriage is a covenant and a sacrament.
- Weeks 3 and 4. Listening, speaking and conflict. Pope Francis notes that a family needs three words, please, thank you and sorry, and these weeks practice all three.
- Weeks 5 and 6. Fertility, the body and married intimacy, taught chastely and with medical accuracy, including what to expect on the wedding night and how to talk about it.
- Weeks 7 and 8. Money, family of origin, prayer at home, and finally the promises you will speak.
If questions come up about what the Church teaches on specific acts, our is it a sin answers explain the reasoning with sources.
The love of friendship unifies all aspects of marital life and helps family members to grow constantly. This love must be freely and generously expressed in words and acts. In the family, “three words need to be used.
Choose the Couples Program
Pastoral guidanceThe Engaged program is included in the Couples Program, together with four other guided programs you can use after the wedding. The plan includes everything in Membership: the library, courses and the monthly live expert Q&A. You also get Ask with Sources with 300 questions a month, weekly exercises and conversation cards, and one private 30 minute video consultation every 3 months (4 a year on yearly) with a Catholic therapist, a Catholic sex therapist or an NFP instructor. Many couples use the consultation for an NFP chart review.
The price is $49 a month, or $24 a month billed yearly ($288). Two logins, one plan, and no free plan. Ask your parish whether it accepts an online program; the certificate lists every module completed. If your parish wants to offer the program to every engaged couple, it can start the self serve Parish plan.
Couples Program
For a couple who wants guided programs and a counselor. Two logins, one plan.
$24 /month
Billed $288 yearly, or $49 billed monthly
Choose the Couples Program- Five guided 8 week programs, including Engaged
- Completion certificate listing every module
- One private 30 minute video consultation every 3 months
- Catholic therapist, sex therapist or NFP instructor
- Ask with Sources, 300 questions a month
- Full library, courses and monthly live Q&A
An honest word about what online preparation is not
Pastoral guidanceAn online program supports your preparation. It does not replace your meetings with the priest or deacon who will witness your marriage, the paperwork your parish needs, or the sacrament of confession before the wedding. The consultation is a private conversation with a professional, not ongoing therapy. If either of you is carrying something heavier, such as an addiction, past abuse or serious doubts about the marriage, please speak with your priest and a local counselor.
For everything else, the program is a calm, faithful place to talk about Catholic intimacy and marriage before your wedding day. See the pricing and get started when you are ready.
Sources
Every source below is linked to the full text on vatican.va or usccb.org. Quotations are short and given word for word.
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CCC 1632 Doctrine
Catechism of the Catholic Church 1632 (The Sacrament of Matrimony)
So that the spouses' yes may be free and responsible and the marriage rest on solid foundations, preparation for marriage is of prime importance, with the example and teaching of parents and families and the help of the Church community.
Read the source -
CCC 1641 Doctrine
Catechism of the Catholic Church 1641 (The Sacrament of Matrimony)
Christian spouses receive a grace proper to the sacrament of Matrimony that perfects their love and strengthens their unity, helping them attain holiness in married life and in welcoming and educating children.
Read the source -
CCC 1626 Doctrine
Catechism of the Catholic Church 1626 (The Sacrament of Matrimony)
The exchange of consent between the spouses is the indispensable element that makes the marriage. If consent is lacking, there is no marriage.
Read the source -
AL 133 Magisterium
Pope Francis, Amoris Laetitia 133 (2016)
Love must be freely and generously expressed in words and acts. In the family three words are needed: please, thank you and sorry.
Read the source -
AL 136 Magisterium
Pope Francis, Amoris Laetitia 136 (2016)
Dialogue is essential for experiencing, expressing and fostering love in marriage and family life, but it is the fruit of a long and demanding apprenticeship, because men and women communicate differently.
Read the source -
CCC 2368 Doctrine
Catechism of the Catholic Church 2368 (The Sixth Commandment)
For just reasons spouses may wish to space the births of their children. They must ensure their desire does not come from selfishness but fits the generosity of responsible parenthood, and they must conform their behavior to the objective criteria of morality.
Read the source